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Any or all of the behaviors you listed might be completely appropriate given the right circumstance.
1. I usually love charging in and being the first to engage in the battle. Sometimes it pays off, and I do a lot of damage. Sometimes it's foolish, and I'm the first to die. Either style (too brave or too cautious) can be the right choice and lead to victory, but it could just as easily lead to defeat. I usually find myself winning more when I slow down, see what the rest of my team is doing, and go with the flow. "Teamwork!" So... instead of calling cautious people cowardly or selfish, recognize that there are plenty of occasions where prudence and caution are appropriate or even favorable. In conclusion: it's situational.
2. Fixers have weapons too. There are times when the team is healthy, and it's the right choice for them to float up and add to the damage, especially if they can help finish someone off. Obviously most healers usually know their role, and if their team needs healing, they usually focus on that, as they realize it's probably their strongest contribution to the battle. Sometimes when they hide, it's because they know that Fixers usually get focused harder than any other type of ship, and for them to do their job (healing), they need to stay alive. They figure other players should also see the logic in not exposing themselves too brazenly... but they certainly can't stop you from charging to your own death... In conclusion: it's situational.
3. Speeders... yeah, they speed around. It's what they do... I'm going to guess you haven't played too much speeder. With only 2 weapons, Speeders spend a lot of time on cooldown, so all they have left is to be a zippy gnat, distracting and frustrating the unfriends. By drawing lots of fire, they give the rest of their team good opportunity to safely advance and unleash devastation on the other team. Sometimes it pays off, and they survive and look like gods. Other times they take an unlucky crit (or mine), and they look silly dying so fast. It's just how Speeder game-play goes... Don't blame them from trying to do the only job they can do though... In conclusion: by speeding around, they are helping the team. Learn to take advantage of the opportunities they open up for you by drawing attention away from you.
4. I am not one to believe that always sticking together is the right choice. In fact, after re-watching several recent losses, it seems that the other team's strategy was to fan out and come at us from all angles. As a team, we got caught together, couldn't figure out where to focus at the same time, attacks were coming in from all sides, and we lost horribly. Sometimes staying together is good. Sometimes it's the best way to lose. In conclusion: it's situational.
5. Defenders are slow. They know this. They know their biggest threat are speeders and enforcers because they are so easily outmaneuvered, and they can't dodge the Big Torpedoes heading their way after getting Frosted by those yellow boats... Defenders best chance of winning a skirmish with Speeders/Enforcers are to withdraw, and force the enemy yellows to come to them, on their turf. Then they have a little more control over when/how that battle will go, and hopefully their teammates will realize the situation and help. In conclusion: Defenders are usually wise to hide from yellows... but it's situational.
Looking at some of your other comments... HP isn't everything. Damage isn't everything. Speed isn't everything. One particular playstyle isn't everything. There are a million ways to contribute and be successful in this game. That variety is what makes this game so great! I feel you could learn and improve by thinking a bit more about alternative perspectives and ways to play. Watch some replays from other ships' points of view, and try to see what they might have been thinking...
Best of luck to you!
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