Thanks. The key learning for me was that I can't make other people play like a team. But I can play like a team. Railing against their behavior, no matter how stupid, accomplishes nothing. What does accomplish something is attempting to support them if it's even remotely possible. There have been times when my initial impressions of my team were pretty poor and we were heavily outgunned. Sometimes the team surprises me and pulls themselves together and I'm glad I tried hard to blunt the initial damage of the poor decisions. I try to hold those times in my head when I'm tempted to just throw up my hands in disgust and let the enemy team put me out of my misery.
Spoiler: Story time if you like stories
So this is another one of the fun teams produced by our recent matchmaking system. They got 3 M5 shooters and an M4 healer. I think they were given an M2 enfo to make up for that (LOL). We had 1 M5 shooter, me as an M4, 2 M3's and an M4 healer. Even better, our M5 was at some stupidly low infamy making me suspect floater/tanker and he was a mortar boat. Sure enough, he did float through the initial stages of the combat. That's a frequent occurrence at my level... high shooter floats. I just treat it as a random condition of the battle field. Rather than rage, I just accept it and loiter for a bit to see if he's just taking longer to load or something and then assume it's a 4v5.
My expectations plummeted the moment our M3 shooters chanted "Together! Attack" and took off on opposite sides of the map. There was nothing I could do about the one far away from me but the one nearest me crept behind at a safe-ish distance. I'm trying to keep an eye on him and our sleepy M5 at the same time trying to decide what to do. Then the M3 runs straight into one of their M5 shooters and before they even engage I'm hitting the throttle. I was pleased with that decision in hindsight. There were a lot of good reasons to sacrifice him but I felt that losing such a big percentage of our already feeble throw weight so already in the battle was not a winning plan. Happily, the M5 switched his focus to me after a quick succession of cannons and both myself and the heavily damaged M3 got back out again. I was curious why the unfriend didn't follow and finish one or both of us off. He likely could've. But when I came around the corner here's what I saw.
Remember the M3 shooter on the other side of the map? He had thought better of it after seeing a red dot and had wisely chosen to disengage and get back over to the rest of us. He was already all patched up and shiny. The fixer had positioned himself perfectly so he was safely away from the combat area but near enough to help should we survive. My stricken M3 was already well on his wy to full recovery. The M5 in pursuit decided the 4 of us were a bit too big of a bite so quickly I was topped off too.
We all rolled forward as a team and by then our sleepy M5, for whatever reasons, decided to start chugging forward to join us. The unfriends, on the other hand, had somehow managed to split themselves up and despite their superior gunnery they went down fast. I cannot even describe how stunned I was that we won so handily after that initial team roster and then the opening minute or more of play. I was glad that rather than say, "Screw this!" I made my best team play trying to resurrect a hopeless situation. OK, I admit it. I was stunned that it worked but still pleased with the decision.
Slowly I'm learning to read my team from the preliminary battle screen (which I study assiduously before combat) and from their initial behavior. Even more slowly I'm figuring out strategies where I can make myself some useful part of whatever they're going to do. What I don't try to do is make them all fall in line. It just isn't going to happen at my infamy. That sense of team unity doesn't exist.
Hmmmm... maybe my next Noob to Noob needs to be on reading and interpreting the team rosters? You higher level players will probably be astonished, appalled, and amused at the things you can discern from the tea leaves.
*** Edited to add ***
Yes, I make plenty of my own really poor decisions also and yes, I have fond and astonished memories of my team digging my ass out again. It's called Noob to Noob for a reason